rock on.

ah. i havent been here for ages:/

the past 2-3 weeks since school ended(in a way) have just been a load of studying and swimming. in fact im just taking a breather from doing chem to do this. THe exams are approaching and the pressure's really on. but sometimes i just dun feel like doing work. times like these. liberation from the need to travel to school everyday at 630am has been good for health and studies i think. productivity has increased by 200% and i get a hell lot more time to swim and on top of that squeeze in some time to play around haha.

sometime last week i went to watch chunyin perform in a harmoc concert. VJC. the mugging life really sucks. feels like a self imposed home arrest/torture. i need to get out to play more i guess. but i feel guilty about doing that everytime. what the hell is this. sometimes i worry that this guilt will not subside even when exams are over.

i've been doing the chem challenging drill qns and math revision package all this time. damn if the CTs come out some screwed up qns im gonna flip.

anw the stupid song on my blog is getting irritating cos the imeem link mysteriously changed to some stupid sample. zzz.

and my throwing days are finally over
hahaha.
oh well i could consider my two years training as a waste of time
seeing that i did not achieve anyth
(other than the sd meet which was a joke?)
seeing that i still failed to qualify after two years?

but all things considered i guess i was never cut out for throwing
it was a new experience altogether
and i feel i've improved loads from the first time i threw
and im much stronger and fitter than before
theres really no point feeling like an underachiever
i'll just take these two years as a strengthening course

now im ready to work on my bass and guitar full time
as well as my studies
of course
im gonna try sth new now
just havent figured out what it is

meanwhile NJ track and field guys is no longer a 3 point team!
woah. i think its actually on its way to greatness
though we are suffering a deficit in the throws team
in both size and numbers. -.-
hwachong just pwns us flat
how.
mayb the 6 year ip program can actually save us
project: fishing for fatties

on a side note i've done my napfa and it was satisfactory
29/30.

alright back to poisson and all that fuck.

so much for holidays.
its ending in about a day
SUCK LAR.

school starts too early i insist
its insane
even if i were the first person to step through the gates of NJ,
i have less than an hour to run
how freaking early is that?!
and to be serious the system by which we(JC ppl) are educated is inefficient
it does not work.
it kills the minds of students
it kills creativity
it makes us so tired out and drained
it generates so much anxiety and stress that if the school won something for student welfare it would be the perfect irony.
thank god its only two(or three) years.
when people say that studying life is much better than working life, im quite sure they leave JC life out of consideration.
plus i think i have some low blood pressure shit or something.
i cant sit still without falling asleep
and school. it just asks you to sit still for HOURS listening to blabber.
how ridiculous does it get
and they force us through such rigid time tables
who cares if our state of welfare allows us to concentrate right?
just teach and get paid.

alright so my argument is flawed and full of logical fallacies
but what the heck i need a longer break
one week seems like pathetic shit
to think that im facing napfa, nationals, and school altogether when it reopens

i need a chronosphere that lasts a month.

oh and today was the SD meet
which was lame as usual
there was this umpire who checked for DQ, measured, and recorded all at the same time
and there was once the shot put bounced and landed in another hole
and he took that hole for recording.
salute.

well today i didnt do any homework.
i guess i owned myself
but i dun feel like doing any homework today
today is homework free day (self declared)
homework can go screw itself with a cactus.
or a mace
or a bomb which explodes

damn. this must be the worst school start im having
i feel like crap.

woah holidays.
feels like the part of the run where u finish the slope and come to level ground
plus u're allowed to slow down.
woah shiok.
but then again a quick scan ahead reveals more upward slopes and a cliff.
sigh.

for me the holidays began badly
SAAA opens yesterday and i screwed up real bad
i threw like wat 2m lesser than on training days?
wat the shit
the feeling's like crap
u go onto the pit
and all the other 16 throwers, the umpires, and the waiting sprinters are staring at ya
and i feel my strength drain in the instant
and i just couldnt throw
and its not my first time competing either
why;s this happening?
mayb its the shoes
mayb its the no breakfast?
ah. i swear it wont happen again.

right after the lousy competition i went for bandage 2 with paul wensong and daniel.
well for what it lacked in entertainment it certainly made up in comedy.
a lot of retarded things happened
and after watching i suddenly felt like i had alot of experience performing
but really i've onli performed that little
and i feel like performing alot more
music makes my life.

and well a few minutes ago i was doing halogenoalkanes
the holidays are just going to be filled with revision and homework
but still im grateful for the break
school life KILLS.

well its been about a week since i last had time to blog
and stuff happened.

haha well first off last saturday weishuen and i decided to try out for math tuition
since his math was not to good and mine was entirely screwed up.
happens that the teacher was a PRC(wtf) and when he opened his mouth to say the first sentence weishuen was alr writing 'i want out' on my worksheet.
i didnt understand anyth in that tuition and it vaguely reminded me of NJ's math tutorials:
just sit and let the teacher rattle on, do ur work, get out.
first thing i did when lesson ended was to quit.
lucky i didnt pay anyth.

the following sunday night i jammed at caleb's house with zestin, paul and wensong
in preparation for talentime and supposedly livenloaded which we did not go for in the end.
what can i say, those guys are just fun.
music is pure fun.'
after much random jamming we decided upon no such thing-john mayer

the following week was a sort of repeat of normal school days,
go to school late, study, train, go home sleep.
except that i had some jamming sessions slotted in between,
such as the day we messed up INE hub and got that guy pissed off.
but we had our first layer recording experience, and it was pretty screwed up.
but once again the jamming was fun

and well came friday the 13th.
the day started in the morning after a short run out of school with yanwen
well we sort of lagged too long after the run
and were going to be late for assembly
deciding to pon, we headed for the toilets near the squash courts to bathe
guess who we ran into? sham.
he told us to hurry
we hurried.
while bathing he sent that j3 female pe teacher in to catch us
wow. and we got marked late and had to stand and sweat at the side gate
friday the 13th proven true?

haha during talentime that night
at a mere 30 mins before i was due for performance,
my bass guitar's washer came loose and fell out
the input jack fell into the guitar
this means that i couldnt insert the cable into my bass
put it simply, my bass was screwed.
unlucky? haha.

feeling like a horror movie come alive,
i remembered that there was an extra bass in the shooting range as i was there with jitsheng just hours ago.
i borrowed a phone to call jit,
i couldnt get through.
unfortunate?

i called tingsoon next. he told me jit may be in the range shooting, where there was no reception.
in my performance outfit,
i ran all the way from LT 5 to the range
it was locked. i called jitsheng again.
his phone had died(no batt).

feeling like my day couldnt have gotten worse,
i ran back to LT 5
i had perspired like crap in my outfit
and desperately needed to cool down
meanwhile ashwyn and gang were trying to fix my bass

thank god ashwyn was rather pro and he fixed the washer and hooked out the input jack with hair pins and 5 cent coins.
pure genius.
and i had my bass back, though it was fragile now and i had to be extra careful with handling it.
i went on to perform for samson and delilah, and the acoolstics.
hahaha and amazingly it all went well
samson and delilah were runner ups,
the acoolstics were first.
im so getting a new bass

and friday the 13th was one scary day for me
but in the end it all turned out alright
thanks be to god
there is none like you.

i also got my ipod yesterday.
its orange in color but it looks brown
so its alright
im quite satisfied with it though it may have cost a bomb
waking up should be much easier now.

wow 100th post.

yeah so much for niu year
it was over in a flash.
and it IS getting increasingly boring
i realised that i just go to my relatives house, sit down and stone while they blabber away in hokkien.
hardly see any cousins or what that are same aged, and even if they are, they're frequencies are way off.

yeah so im back in sg worrying about my homework status
argh.
when this A levels is over i'll be fucking happy.

i realised that i blog pretty little

its like i havent even touched the 100 post mark and my blog's nearly 3 years old.

hahaha. ok well school kick started better than i anticipated.

i managed to delay slaughter, and do enough hw in between to scrape through lessons

im also perhaps getting not so slacky about math anymore

the onli subject i've let hang loose is chem

sorry yip but too bad chem is content based

i'll cram it over the weekend.

a few days ago lennon told me that 'we have no lives' in nj

true enough on a normal training day i stay in school from dusk to dawn

more than 12 freaking hours lah.

i find that all those nice clothes i have chucked in my wardrobe, simply remain chucked there except for sundays(church) and outing days.

true enough i dun hang out and go play around like i did in secondary school anymore

i dun stick around orchard road/cityhall/queensway/friend's houses till 2am anymore

it seems my life revolves around studying, training, studying and training.

but think about it ppl.

while i do not advice ppl to go home and mug right after school(that is hardcore)

is going out with friends and doing the same stuff really considered as having a life?

does walking around window shopping, hitting the lanshop, eating at posh places, going to the arcade, watching every movie that hits the big screens, qualify as an exciting take to life?

does dispensing your parents hard earned money so you can enjoy for the moment, from which you gain nothing except perhaps better friendship, qualify as a LIFE?

ultimately, we all do the same thing everytime we go out

we hit town, we go to sentosa, we spend and eat and shop and we stay out late, accumulating oil on our skin, going home feeling sticky and tired.

dun you get sick of it?

i mean, i have nothing against go out-ers(lol), i was once a go out-er.

but life is all about balance.

going out to see my friends and catch up and all is sth i would definitely do.

and then comes the complex problem of ppl with too many friends, which i do not wish to discuss.

but going out for the sake of going out, becos its having a life?

thats dumb.

its what bengs do u know

they go out

they dun study

they dun train

look at them. either skinny or fat. its a joke.

i believe that having a life, is a personally defined.

based entirely on individual happiness

perhaps some ppl feel happy with wasting their lives away enjoying for the moment

they feel happy spending the day and copious amounts of money without gaining anyth, without improving their personal skills.

perhaps some ppl feel that being surrounded with friends is all that matters, and ensuring that these friendship remain strong, is what defines their life.

and then they turn around and say that some ppl have no lives.

well hey, i thought i would never say this, but what if some ppl feel that getting a proper education is actually something which defines their happiness?
what if some ppl feel that excelling physically, the intensity and aftermath of sports and exercise, is what makes them feel good?

haha what if some ppl actually are planning our their future happiness and LIFE?

ones which can be sustained and which will ultimately pawn the ones which are for the moment?

what if some ppl actually feel that music defines their life?

well. the thing about having a girlfriend/boyfriend is a trump card that doesnt apply here.

if u get what i mean.

so

as far as im concerned

going out is something i can dispense with currently(JC)

thrs stuff more important

studies, training, jamming and the occasional going out?

i think thats enough LIFE for me to handle at the moment actually

eating into my sleep.